October 14, 2011

For Posterity

Almost three years now. It's been almost three years since I've touched this site, and I'm doing so now, nearly four months into another weight loss push, in order to preserve my experience. Reading through all of my posts from years back, it really shows me what an awful, awful relationship I had with food. Back on my first attempt on WW down in L.A., seeing the bits about the compulsive eating, binging, etc. - it was scary. I haven't been that low down in quite awhile.

So what's new with me? Well, I'm still living in the house I mentioned during the previous go, and I'm still with my partner of nearly 7 years. I am gainfully employed now, but the wonderful dog I mentioned, Zippy, passed away quick tragically in 2009 from a brain tumor. The mixture of long-term unemployment combined with his loss left me profoundly depressed. I am now on medication to treat long-term, deep-seated depression, and I do believe the stability I've found with that has allowed me to approach weight loss in a new way.

I decided to join Jenny Craig back in late June, and I've been on it ever since, no binges, no regrets. And so far I'm down over 30 pounds. Many days can be a struggle, and the food certainly becomes a bit boring - but I haven't felt out of control with my eating, and I'm slowly feeling stronger and stronger. And I've had zero gains and have lost over 1.5 lbs (on average) each week. Is Jenny Craig working for me? I'd say yes. For my lifestyle, it works, and it keeps me in line.

I'm experienced enough to know that things won't always be rosy: there may be some weeks where I don't lose at all, or that I even register a gain. And there are days where I have cravings like you wouldn't believe. Cravings that harken back to the glory days of 2004, when I was eating 2 burritos in one sitting. There are moments where I want to eat a whole planet of food. But I'm really proud (and a little shocked) to say that I've been doing pretty well at managing those cravings.

So I'm feeling confident. Every week I lose is another week towards long-term success. Each week I avoid falling victim to the cravings is a week towards lifelong taste changes. It's pretty exciting. So I'll log in from time to time to share my successes and challenges - because looking back at all these posts is so mesmerizing, and in the future, when I'm feeling nostalgic, I can come back and read through my journey.

Posted by weezgrrl at October 14, 2011 11:39 AM