March 26, 2005

miss congeniality 2: armed & fabulous

click here for amazon.com linkmiss congeniality 2: armed & fabulous
dir. by john pasquin

This was, quite possibly, the single-most disappointing movie-watching experience I've suffered through in years. God dammit, why did this have to suck so much? In stark contrast from the original, there was not an ounce of laughs to be had during the entire movie. I just have to ask Sandra Bullock, "Why??"

Perhaps disappointment doesn't adequately describe it. The first film was such a rockin'-good time for me. The laughs were sincere, the timing was great - everything seemed to work. In the sequel, however, everything felt forced. The jokes lay flat, badly written, poorly acted, woefully mis-directed - I was hardly moved to even let a groan escape my lips, I was so embarrassed for everyone involved.

The movie felt unfinished, by every measure. The script felt rushed, and seemed like it had been written by the singlemost-unfunny guy on the planet. The movie was cut together in such a slapdash manner - the pacing was painful... which brings up something else... The music (or lack thereof).

There wasn't a single well-placed musical cue in the entire thing. I think they spent every dime they had budgeted for music on the painful dragshow scene (featuring "Cabaret" and "Proud Mary"), making the occassional sting or play-on nonexistent. I was begging for a cue, but was left, instead, with shudder-inducing uncomic stunts and undramatic pauses.

Sandra Bullock could not have been less-endearing. Regina King... I was just so sad for her. The two ladies' on-screen chemistry could not have been more confusing (nor less amusing). I half-expected them to start making out towards the end of the movie. Funnily enough, I don't think the filmmakers were going for this. It's too bad, while it might not have been able to redeem the film, it certainly would have made for an interesting turn.

So, in conclusion, I think everyone involved in this cinematic disaster should be taken out, lined up, and shot, repeatedly. Even Ms. Bullock, as I believe her aptitude for sweet, funny, comedic roles is long dried out, predecessing even the previous let-down that was Two Weeks Notice. I give Miss Congeniality 2: Armed & Fabulous two very sincere Tssk Tssk's. And I'll throw in a Harrumph for kicks.
posted by julie at March 26, 2005 08:13 AM


BROWSE THE COMPLETE ARCHIVES, OR BY CATEGORY: JOURNAL | GEEKFEST | TRAVELOGUE | RECENT MOVIES | RECENT MUSIC | RECENT BOOKS | MOVIES | MUSIC | THE WORLD | MINI | LINK-O-RAMA | POP CULTURE | THEME THURSDAY | FRIDAY FIVE | PHOTO FRIDAY | PHOTOS | ELSEWHERE | OLD BLOG