April 06, 2005

dirty tales of a blue shirt

Why is it that every single time I wear my brand new "electric blue"-colored v-neck shirt it gets soaked with some liquid substance? First time I wore it was in Las Vegas, and after only a few hours it was soaked with remnants of a Starbucks white mocha, courtesy of some power-shifting by my boyfriend, Erik, while motoring to get petrol before a MINI run.

And of course, today cannot be an exception. Just now, while sipping the last of my Gatorade - thinking "YES! I made it through my meal without spilling anything!" - it happened. Gatorade dripped all down the front of my shirt. So of course it won't dry clear, like water (which I've spilled on the shirt before - not once, but several times).

Gawd dammit! What is the frickin' deal, people? Do I need a bib? I guess I just need a baby bib, 'cuz I'm a big messy baby who cannot be entrusted with a beverage holder of any kind. Someone get me a fecking baby bottle already. Feck.


posted by julie at April 6, 2005 02:07 PM

things people have said

It is the eltromagnetics of the female Breasts. They draw elements to them and unfortunately some fabric combinations are worse than others. I suggest that also the fact that the shirt is v-neck allows for greater release of breast eltromagnetism. Your boyfriend, the rocket scientist should be able to verify my statement.

so said: Karin at April 6, 2005 06:13 PM

Karin is right. NASA undertook a study of much the same phenomenon when it was noted that, despite the prudish nature of jumpsuits when compared to v-necks, female astronauts still found the fronts of their uniforms covered with little globules of Tang.

I have to apologize, but that power-shift was a cleverly disguised experiment in the same investigation, but within a denser gravity field. I promise that no specifics will be included in the report to my superiors.

so said: erik at April 6, 2005 07:24 PM

Nerds. (yes, that was a capital "N")

so said: julie (me) at April 7, 2005 12:35 PM



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